Can Muslim Women Marry non-Muslim Men?

Interfaith Marriage

An Algerian woman named Zain Ameen posted on Twitter on March 5th that the Qur'an does not contain any verse that prohibits Muslim women from marrying non-Muslim men. She was trying to justify the 2017 move by the Algerian government to remove a long existing law that prohibited
Muslim women in the country from marrying non Muslim men. 

Zain and others like her assert that it is discriminatory to allow Muslim men that 'previlege' and deny Muslim women. Do they have a point?

The Qur'an is clear on who a Muslim can marry; male or female. Allah (SWT) says, "This day all good foods have been made lawful, and the food of those who were given the Scripture is lawful for you and your food is lawful for them. And lawful in marriage are chaste women from among the believers and chaste women from among those who were given the Scripture before you, when you have given them their due compensation, desiring chastity, not unlawful sexual intercourse or taking secret lovers. And whoever denies the faith - his work has become worthless, and he, in the Hereafter, will be among the losers". Suratul Maidah (5:5)

It is a known fact that same gender sexual relations (Homosexuality) is a capital crime which the Islamic schools of thought consider to be punishable by death even though, the punishment is not as harsh if the culprits are females. For females, a public lashing and/or imprisonment is the norm.

That being said, it's not rocket science to tell what gender the above mentioned verse is addressing. The verse says, "...And [lawful in marriage are] chaste women from among the believers and chaste women from among those who were given the Scripture before you...". 

What gender was Allah granting this permission? 

Allah was obviously speaking to men. If some women of this era feel like marrying Christian or Jewish men then, they will have to bring forth a verse or even a Hadith that gives the permission.

It is evident from the lives of the early Muslim women that these verse permitted only Muslim men to marry outside the faith.

Let's take a look at some Muslim women in the time of the pious predecessors who refused to be married to Christian men even when they had no authority watching them.

Ramlah bint Abu Sufyan

Ramlah bint Abu Sufyan was married to Ubaidullah Ibn al Harith. They were among the early Muslims who migrated to Abyssinia. As fate would have it, Ubaidullah apostatize and became a Christian. He tried to make Ramlah embrace Christianity; she refused and divorced him without a command or instigation from the Prophet (SAW). It was about four years after Ramlah divorced Ubaidullah that the Prophet (SAW) married her.

Khawla bint al-Azwar

Khawla was a warrior in the Muslim army, on one expedition, she was captured by the Christian Byzantine army. Along with other Muslim women, Khawla bint al-Azwar and other Muslim women fought against their captors so fiercely that the Byzantine general had to seek a peaceful way out. 

He offered to marry Khawla bint al-Azwar and make her the queen of Damascus an offer to which she replied, "I wouldn't even accept you to be the shepherd of my camels! How do you expect me to degrade myself and live with you? I swear that I'll be the one to cut off your head for your insolence."

And so it happened, the Byzantine general was killed by Khawla bint al-Azwar herself.

It should be noted that the Byzantine general was a Christian and despite all the wealth and fame he promised, Khawla refused to be married to a Christian.

It is evident that Muslim women saw it as an insult to be touched by a non-Muslim man. They were not afflicted by the feminist agenda which is in fact atheism.

Some 'Muslim women' have even advocated for Muslim women to marry idol worshipers all in the name of 'Unity and Diversity'; Islam vehemently prohibits this. 

Allah says in the Qur'an, "And do not marry polytheistic women until they believe. And a believing slave woman is better than a polytheist, even though she might please you. And do not marry polytheistic men [to your women] until they believe. And a believing slave is better than a polytheist, even though he might please you. Those invite you to the Fire, but Allah invites to Paradise and to forgiveness, by His permission. And He makes clear His verses to the people that perhaps they may remember". Suratul Baqarah (2:221).

This verse makes it absolutely clear that not even Muslim men were granted permission to marry pagan women.

Muslim women held on to this teachings with their molar teeth. Some popular mentions are discussed in this write up.

Rumaysa bint Milhan (Umm Sulaym)

After Umm Sulaym was widowed in Madinah, a handsome young man called Abu Talhah, who was the leader of his tribe (and a pagan) emerge. Umm Sulaym's loyalty and courage appealed to him and he sent her a proposal of marriage. 

As was narrated: Abu Talhah reached Umm Sulaym's house. He asked and was given permission to enter. Her son Anas was present. Abu Talhah explained why he had come and asked for her hand in marriage.

She said to him, "A man like you, Abu Talhah, is not (easily) turned away. But I shall never marry you while you are a kafir (an unbeliever)."

Abu Talhah thought she was trying to put him off and that perhaps she had already preferred someone wealthier and more influential. 

He said to her: "What is it that really prevents you from accepting me, Umm Sulaym? Is it the yellow and the white metals (gold and silver)?"

"Gold and silver?" she asked somewhat taken aback and in a slightly censuring tone. 

"Yes," he said. 

"I swear to you, Abu Talhah, and I swear to Allah and His Messenger that if you accept Islam, I shall be pleased to accept you as a husband, without any gold or silver. I shall consider your acceptance of Islam as my mahr (dowry)."

Abu Talhah understood well the implications of her words. His mind turned to the idol he had made from wood and on which he lavished great attention in the same way that important men of his tribe venerated and cared for their personal idols.

The opportunity was right for Umm Sulaym to stress the futility of such idol worship and she went on: "Don't you know Abu Talhah, that the god you worship besides Allah grew from the earth?" 

"That's true," he said.

"Don't you feel stupid while worshiping part of a tree while you use the rest of it for fuel to bake bread or warm yourself? (If you should give up these foolish beliefs and practices) and become a Muslim, Abu Talhah, I shall be pleased to accept you as a husband and I would not want from you any sadaqah apart from your acceptance of Islam."

"Who shall instruct me in Islam?" asked Abu Talhah. "I shall," Umm Sulaym replied. "How?"

And she told him, "Utter the declaration of truth and testify that there is no god but Allah and that Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah. Then go to your house, destroy your idol and throw it away."

Abu Talhah left and reflected deeply on what Umm Sulaym had said. 

He came back to her beaming with happiness and said, "I have taken your advice to heart. I declare that there is no god but Allah and I declare that Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah."

Umm Sulaym and Abu Talhah were married. Anas, her son, was pleased and the Muslims would say: "We have never yet heard of a mahr that was more valuable and precious than that of Umm Sulaym for she made Islam her mahr." 

This is another example of a Muslim woman who refused to be married to a non-Muslim man despite his wealth, status and looks.

Umm Hakim bint al-Harith

After the conquest of Makkah, Umm Hakim embraced Islam.  But, her husband Ikrimah bin Abu Jahl ran away. Umm Hakim was still in love with Ikrimah and so she sought amnesty for him from the Prophet (SAW). As was narrated: Umm Hakim then got up and professed her faith in Islam and said: "O Messenger of God, Ikrimah has fled from you to the Yemen out of fear that you would kill him. Grant him security and God will grant you security."

"He is secure," promised the Prophet. Umm Hakim set out immediately in search of Ikrimah. Accompanying her was a Greek slave. When they had gone quite far on the way, he tried to seduce her but she managed to put him off until she came to a settlement of Arabs. She sought their help against him. They tied him up and kept him. Umm Hakim continued on her way until she finally found Ikrimah on the coast of the Red Sea in the region of Tihamah. He was negotiating transport with a Muslim seaman who was saying to him:

"Be pure and sincere and I will transport you."

"How can I be pure?" asked Ikrimah.

"Say, I testify that there is no god but Allah and that Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah."

"I have fled from this very thing," said Ikrimah.

At this point, Umm Hakim came up to Ikrimah and said: "O cousin, I have come to you from the most generous of men, the most righteous of men, the best of men... from Muhammad ibn Abdullah. I have asked him for an amnesty for you. This he has granted. So do not destroy yourself. "

Ikrimah asked, "Have you spoken to him?"

"Yes, I have spoken to him and he has granted you amnesty," she assured him and he returned with her. She told him about the attempt of their Greek slave to dishonor her and Ikrimah went directly to the Arab settlement where he lay bound and killed him.

At one of their resting places on their way back, Ikrimah wanted to sleep with his wife, Umm Hakim, but she vehemently refused and said: "I am a Muslimah and you are a Mushrik (polytheists)."

This story shows that immediately Umm Hakim embraced Islam she divorced her husband in her heart despite the love she had for him.

We have been able to see what Allah has said about marriage to non-Muslims; for both men and women. We have also seen how the early Muslim women assimilated the commands of Allah. 

So, when next we are faced with the question, "Can Muslim women marry non-Muslim men?", we know the answer is a capital 'NO'.

Real Muslim women see it as a shame to be touched by an unclean being such as a non-Muslim man. Muslim women see it as a thing of pride that only a man of Paradise has the right to touch them and enjoy their company.

We live in a world where Islam has been relegated to the Masajid and people are free to do whatever pleases them. We might not have the privilege to determine what happens in our communities but, we reserve the right to point out sinners who think they can justify their sins using the Islamic Scriptures.